Women Who Wear Polka Dots
Alex Cahill is sitting at her desk, puzzled over an earlier statement that Cordell Walker had made to her.
Her brow arches, “Now, what did he mean by that statement: You know what they say about women who wear polka dots”!
They had just had a romantic interlude at her apartment and he was grinning that silly little grin the whole time she was re-dressing.
It was a beautiful February morning and the weather was unusually warm: she couldn’t wait to drag out some of her spring attire. She had chosen another blouse that had polka dots, but this time she had worn a jacket over the blouse and then added earrings with matching dots.
She was turning from side to side, looking at herself in her mirror, she could see the ranger looking back at her, grinning.
She smiles back at him, “What are you grinning about”?
“Nothing hon, just wondering about something”.
“Wondering about what”?
Walker scratches his chin, “Just wondering what’s with all the polka dots? You’ve been wearing them a lot lately, every since the weather got warmer”!
Alex stares back at him, “You don’t like what I’m wearing”?
“Of course I like what you’re wearing, and even more so when you’re wearing---nothing”!
Alex looks back at the blouse, “Is it the blouse, is it too much with the jacket? I could take the jacket off”?
“Alex, you look fine! And, what do I know about fashion—you’re constantly getting onto me about coordinating my wardrobe better”!
“So, that’s it---you haven’t liked my choice of wardrobe lately. But, the other day at Jimmy’s bar-be-que, you said you like the polka dotted dress and the hat, with the scarf around it”?
“Yes, I did say that and I meant it---but almost every day you’ve been wearing something---with dots on it”!
The blonde exhales, “Oh, I get it now! This is your subtle way of trying to tell me that I’m gaining weight”?
Walker throws his hands up in the air, “Alex, I’ve never said you were gaining weight, what brought that up”?
Alex commences to take the jacket off, she sighs. “I’m sorry, I guess I’m just tired. But---do the dots make me look fat”?
The ranger sighs as he walks up behind her and puts his arms around her waist, he nibbles on her neck.
“No, hon---the dots do not make you look fat and besides-- you know what they say about women who wear polka dots, don’t you”?
She reaches back and caresses his bearded face, and then she frowns, “What? What do they say about women who wear polka dots”?
He pushes her away quickly, “Sorry---got to go---running late---got to meet Trivette—bye hon”!
She’s reaching out for his arm, “Wait a minute---what did you mean by that”?
He continues backing up to the door and then picks up pace as he runs to the front door, “I’ll call you later”!
It’s now 3 hours later and Alex is still trying to figure out that statement.
She has been chewing on the end of her pencil; the results are teeth marks and tangerine lipstick. Her secretary walks in and stares back at Alex.
“Ms Cahill, are you alright”?
Alex sighs, “Yes, Sara—I’m fine. Just a little confused about something”.
“Confused? About what”?
Alex rises from her desk and approaches Sara cautiously, “Uh, Sara—could I ask you something”?
“Of course Ms Cahill, what is it”?
“This is going to sound crazy, but have you ever heard the saying---or statement—“You know what they say about women who wear polka dots”?
“Excuse me” Sara mutters, “but I’m not wearing—any polka dots”.
“No, no! I wasn’t referring to you—no, Sara you look fine---no, I was referring to that statement---have you ever heard it before”?
Sara smiles, “Yes, I’ve heard it”.
Alex’s brow arches, “Then---what does it mean”?
“Is this some kind of joke”?
“No----I don’t think so”! Alex is trying to explain herself,” someone said it to me earlier today and I don’t know what that person meant by that statement. So, if you know, would you please tell me”?
Sara is now smiling, “Would this ‘someone’ be someone with a beard, cowboy hat, and tight fitting jeans”?
Alex clears her throat and answers softly, “Maybe”.
“Really, Ms Cahill---you’ve never heard that saying before, are you serious”?
“Sara---for the last time, what does it refer to”?
Alex’s phone is starting to ring, Sara is laughing as she heads to the door.
“SARA, COME BACK HERE”!
“All I have to say is, you should get out more, Ms Cahill”.
C.D. is whistling away as he looks up to see Alex walking in, her mind a million miles away. She walks absent minded up to the bar, sitting her purse down and sighing.
The old man stares back at her, and cautiously asks, “Alex, sweetheart—are you alright”?
She forces a smile, “Yeah---I guess I’m o.k.---just can’t stop thinking about something that was said to me. Could I have some tea, please”?
The old man is signaling for the waitress, “Of course you can have some tea, you can have anything in here you want! How about a club sandwich, light on the mayo”?
Alex nods, “Yes---light on the mayo. As a matter of fact, no mayo at all—it’s just extra calories”.
C.D. smiles, “Something tells me that you’re just a little upset about whatever it was that this person said to you. Who was it, I’ll introduce his head to my frying pan, and then escort his sorry carcass to the door”?
Alex takes the tea that the waitress has brought her, “It was Walker”!
C.D. does a double take, “CORDELL? What the heck has he said to you to get you so upset”?
“I’m not upset, C.D. just confused”!
“Well, what did he say”?
Alex hesitates, “Well---it was a comment that he made, and Ijust don’t know how to take it”.
“Jumping jehosafat---it must have been something really bad---have you two been arguing?
“No, we’re not arguing C.D.---it was more like a statement that he made about my choice in wardrobe lately”.
C.D. shakes his head, “Let’s get this straight---Cordell is saying that there is something wrong with your wardrobe? The same Cordell that has to be told not to wear a bolo to black jacket dinner, the same Cordell that wears a tan hat with black pants---that CORDELL”?
“What’s all the fuss about”? Asks Mabel as she walks up slowly behind the bar. “What has my sweetheart done now, are you picking on Cordell again—you dirty old man”?
“NO! I’m not picking on Cordell---it’s just that Alex said that he made a comment to her about the way she dresses, can you believe that”?
The old woman stares back in disbelief, “My goodness, what did he say?”
Alex repeats the comment to the old couple.
Mabel’s mouth drops open, “He said that---no---not Cordell. Cordell would never---oh my---this is serious”!
C.D. shakes his head again, “I can’t believe that Cordell would say such a thing-----“”
“Then----you two know what that statement means”?
The old couple start making excuses about finding something to do, C.D. looks up and spots Walker’s Uncle Ray sauntering in.
“Uncle Ray, come here---you’re not going to believe what that nephew of yours has done now”!
Alex is again repeating the statement and the old Indian’s eyes go wide.
“I can’t believe this”! Alex replies, “I can’t believe that I’m the only one that doesn’t know what is meant by that statement---even you---Uncle Ray---you know what it means”?
The old Indian slams his fist down on the counter, “Of course I know what it means, I do get off the reservation from time to time”!
“Would someone please tell me what is meant by that statement, or saying---or whatever”?
Both C.D. and Mabel head for the storage room and Uncle Ray is muttering that it’s time to have a ‘pow wow’ with his favorite nephew and another visit to the sweat lodge is in store for
“Washo”. The old Indian leaves.
“Excuse me Ms Cahill”, the waitress is holding the phone up, “it’s your office”.
Alex takes the phone, “Yes, what is it---I’m trying to have lunch”.
The voice is familiar, “Whoa counselor---don’t mean to disturb you, but Walker wants to know where that arrest warrant is”!
Alex counts to ten slowly, “Let me talk to your partner, Mr. Trivette”.
There’s a long pause and then another familiar voice is heard, “Alex, what’s holding up the arrest warrant, we can’t stall much longer”.
Alex is steaming, “The warrant should have reached you by now, where are you”?
“At the corner of Greenwood and Alpine”.
Alex takes a deep sigh, “It should be there soon----“””
“Alex, are you alright? You sound upset about something”?
“Now, why would I be upset---what have I possible got to be upset about---except that little statement you made to me this morning”?
“You know darn well what I’m referring to---the polka dots”?
The ranger frowns, “Polka dots?”
Now Alex is biting her bottom lip. “Yes---polka dots!! What did you mean by that statement”?
“Alex, can’t talk---the warrant is here—see you tonight”!
“Walker, don’t you dare hang up on me----Walker”?
Alex slams the phone down, grabbing her purse and stomping towards the door, muttering.
“I feel like I’ve just stepped into “The Twilight Zone”, I have no earthly idea about what these people are talking about---and if I ever get my hands on Walker, ----if he thinks I like to throw things now, wait till I get a hold of him—I’ll show him a temper tantrum”!
The whole bar and grill is staring back at Ranger Cordell Walker, the blonde attorney is shooting him daggers.
C.D. sighs, “O.k. Cordell we’ve played along with this little joke that you’re playing on Alex, now would you please explain that statement”?
Uncle Ray grunts, “This better be good nephew, you don’t know how close we’ve all come to being scalped”!
Trivette smirks, “Not to mention the “MR’ title---I could feel chill all through the phone lines”!
Walker takes a deep sigh, “Now I know why I don’t like to play jokes on anyone----it always backfires”!
Alex is tapping her long manicured nails against the bar, “We’re waiting”, she hisses.
“O.k., o.k. I heard the saying several weeks ago and when Alex was wearing so many polka dots---I just couldn’t resist”.
Everyone in the bar shouts, “What does it mean”?
Walker looks directly into Alex’s blue eyes, “You know what they say about women who wear polka dots-----“””””
Everyone is edging him on----“Well, what do they say”?
He winks at Alex, “They say---they’re in love---Happy Valentine’s Day Hon”.