Alex's Agony

by

Katie 59

Chapter One

            All three babies had been home now a little under two months and Alex could never remember being so exhausted. Even though she was unable to breast feed the babies because her milk had never come in, they still had to have bottles and it meant preparing a lot of bottles not to mention all of the diaper changing.  Sheila Raven was staying with them to help out with the babies during the daytime, at least that had been what she had been hired to do but she showed a preference for Sam and at first Alex thought that it was because he looked like Sheila, but lately Alex was wondering about why Sheila went to him first unless Walker was around. During the evenings Walker helped out, that is when he got home early enough to do so. But at night Alex was on her own because Walker needed his sleep and so did Sheila who attended school in the evenings.

One morning Alex was cooking breakfast when one of the babies began to cry and she hurried to take care of the baby but Ray grabbed the skillet handle which Alex had left sticking out.  It burned his hand and he dropped it and began to cry. Walker who just entered the kitchen when Ray grabbed the skillet handle picked him up and asked Angela "Where is your mother at?"

"One of the babies cried and Mommy went to take care of it." Angela answered her father as her mother re-entered the kitchen and Walker snapped at her "Ray just got burnt because you were careless and left the skillet handle sticking out where he could grab it. Alex, you should have been more careful."

Taking Ray from her husband Alex took the child to the sink and ran cold water over his hand and said "There, there honey. Mommy will kiss it and make it all better."  Then she kissed his hand and after Ray stopped crying Alex said to Walker "His hand isn't burnt, it's just a little red."

"What about next time Alex?  You can't just leave the kitchen with food cooking on the stove. You know how he gets into everything." Walker asked still upset with her.

Trying hard not to cry Alex answered "Walker, I'm sorry but one of the babies was crying. I didn't mean to leave the handle sticking out where Ray could get at it.  I'll be more careful in the future, okay?"

"Alex, I'm sorry that I snapped at you." Walker said realizing that his wife's nerves were on edge because taking care of three newborns and a toddler and a five year old was a lot of work even if Alex did have help during the day.

"I know that but everything is so hard right now and will be until they start sleeping through the night. Feeding them every four hours is so tiring and I feel as though I'm neglecting Angela and Ray. Oh Walker, what am I going to do?" Alex said still fighting back tears.

"I know honey, I know. How about I get up and help you during the nights with feeding them?  I should have been doing that anyhow, they are my triplets too." Walker asked as he hugged his wife. Alex protested "But Walker, you need to get your sleep, so that you can go to work."

"How about I get up and take over their five a.m. feedings?" Walker asked Alex who answered "We can try that but if it's too much for you let me know." So that's what they did although some mornings Alex insisted on helping him and when he questioned her about it Alex said that she was feeling a lot better about things now that she had some help. When Walker pointed out that Sheila was helping her Alex changed the subject.

Chapter Two

It was now the evening for Ray's second birthday party and Walker was late. When he finally arrived home Alex questioned him "Walker, you're late, where have you been?"

"At work Alex, where else would I be?  Do you have everything ready?"  Walker questioned his wife back who snapped at her husband "Yes, since I'm not allowed to drive yet I asked Erica to pick up the cake and ice cream which you were supposed to pick up at lunch time but I guess that you forgot to do since you were so busy with your job."  Sensing that Alex and Walker were about to have a fight Trivette said "Well since everyone is here, how about we get this party started?  By the way where is the birthday boy?"  Just then Sheila came in with Ray and Walker was stunned to find that his son's hair had been cut really short.  Turning to Alex Walker furiously asked her "Why did you get my son's hair cut?  You know that I wanted to take him for his first hair cut, how could you Alex?"

"I didn't get his hair cut.  Sheila, why is my son hair cut so short?"  Alex questioned Sheila Raven who answered "I'm sorry, I didn't know that Mr. Walker wanted to take Ray for his first hair cut.  Mrs. Walker you've been so overwhelmed lately and I thought that I was helping you out.  I'm sorry if I upset you."  Walker took Ray and assured Sheila "It's okay, I know that you were just trying to help my wife out."

Alex didn't say anything but she was furious that Sheila had gone behind her back and taken Ray to get his hair cut because when Sheila had asked Alex if she wanted her to take him for a hair cut Alex had told Sheila that Walker wanted to do it. Later on that night as they were cleaning up from the party Sheila said to Walker "Again, I'm sorry Mr. Walker for taking Ray to get his hair cut but when Mrs. Walker was saying that she wanted his hair cut for his party but was unable to do so because she couldn't drive, I really thought that I was helping her out."

Patting her on the shoulder Walker again assured her "It's okay Sheila, you were just trying to be helpful, I know that."  Then he went upstairs and confronted Alex "How come you told Sheila that you wanted to get Ray's hair cut before his birthday party but couldn’t because you aren't allowed to drive yet?"

Looking at him as she picked up Cooper Alex answered "I didn't."

"Come on Alex, at least admit it. Why would Sheila lie about something like that?  You were saying that you wanted his hair cut in time for his party." Walker questioned his wife who said "Yes and you said that you would take care of it, so why would I lie about it?"  Just then Angela and Ray came into the nursery and baby Sam began to cry so Alex said to her daughter "Honey sit over there on the rocker and you can hold him. "But before Alex could hand Sam to Angela Sheila picked Sam up and cooing to him sat in the rocker herself and fed Sam his bottle. As she was doing that Sheila said to Alex "I'm sorry about the hair cut Mrs. Walker but you were so upset about not being able to drive and taking care of it yourself that I thought I would help you out by taking care of it for you.  I really did think that I was doing you a favor.  I didn't mean to cause any trouble for you."

Again before Alex could say anything Walker said "It's okay, his hair is cut and as far as I'm concerned it's over and done with."  After Sam was sleeping Sheila placed him in his crib and Alex swore that Sheila smirked at her as she left the nursery. Alex put Cooper in his crib while Walker put Michaela into her crib. Walker then went and put Angela and Ray to bed while Alex vowed to keep an eye on Sheila because she decided that Sheila wasn't as innocent as she acted around Walker.

Chapter Three

Alex's friend Shelley stopped by the ranch to visit with Alex "So Alex, how is it going?"

"Oh Shelley what was I thinking?  This is so much more work than I thought it would be. Why did there have to be three of them at one time?  I sure wasn't expecting Sam."  Alex said to her friend unaware of the fact that Sheila was listening to every word that she said.

"But, it's worth it isn't it?"  Shelley questioned Alex who smiled wryly and answered "Yes, but I am so tired."

I thought that you had help with the babies, isn't that why Sheila lives here?  To help you out." Shelley asked.

"Yes, I have help, at least with Sam." Alex replied and getting concerned Shelley questioned her friend "Alex, what do you mean by that?"

"Sheila only wants to take care of Sam. She doesn't want to help with Michaela or Cooper when it's just the two of us. When Walker's here Sheila does put on a good show of liking them all.  There's something about the way she dotes over Sam that bothers me, like she thinks that Sam is her's or something." Alex answered.

"Have you told Walker about this?" Shelley asked Alex who said "No, it's probably just my imagination, after all Sam looks like Walker's father and Uncle Ray as does Sheila. She might feel more comfortable around him, besides Walker thinks that Sheila can do no wrong and my saying anything to the contrary would just lead to a fight."

That night when Walker got home he jumped on his wife "What is this that I hear about you not wanting Sam?  He ours too whether or not he looks like the others. What's wrong with you?"

Shocked Alex questioned her husband "Walker, what are you talking about?"

"Today when Shelley was here you said that you wished that there had only been the two of them, that it was too much work taking care of three of them and that you hadn't been expecting Sam." Walker explained.

"Yes, I did tell Shelley that I had only expected the two of them. Why did all three of them have to be born at the same time?  But in the next breath I said that it was worth it. And for your information Cordell Walker, if there is anyone who truly wishes that there were less babies it's Sheila not me. Two less to be specific, Cooper and Michaela because the only baby she wants to take care of is Sam. I'll admit that she does put on a good show while you're here of how much she likes the other two but she really doesn't."  Alex snapped at Walker as she tried not to cry.

"Stop it Alex. Now I know that some women after they have given birth have trouble with strange thoughts and think about harming their babies but I never thought that you would be one of them." Walker said to Alex who asked him "Why can't you see that Sheila is the one with a problem, not me. She's fixated on my son."

"I already said stop it Alex. Sheila is just being a concerned nanny, nothing more." Walker snapped at his wife who yelled at him " Just in front of you."

"She was concerned enough about the triplets to call me at work and tell me that you're crying all the time when I'm not here. Sheila thinks that you may have the 'baby blues'. Also when Sam cries you never pick him up unless I'm home, she's worried that you're going to harm him because he doesn't look like the other two do and that you seem to resent his being born. After all you were just expecting Cooper and Michaela, not my son Sam." Walker told her.

Beyond mad Alex screamed at him "Okay, that's quite enough. When Sheila gets back from her classes, she's fired."

"No, she's not." Walker snapped back.

"Let me get this straight a woman that you've only known for a little under two months tells you that I hate my youngest son because of his looks and that I plan to harm him and you believe her and not me?"  Alex questioned her husband who softened his tone and answered his wife "It's not quite like that honey. You have been through so much lately and it had to have affected you mentally."

Now very irate Alex said "I am not a racist nor am I mental. You had better understand this Walker, I'm not lying. Your Sheila is and I want her out of my house tonight."

"She's staying, Alex Sheila has done nothing wrong. Honey hear me out, please get some help for your behavior. You need help before you hurt Sam, not after you've hurt him."  Walker pleaded.

"I'm not getting any help because I don't need it. Furthermore you are a fool Cordell John Walker and if she hurts my child I will never forgive you. Sheila is planning on doing something to Sam, make no mistake about that. Do you hear me Walker?" Alex said to Walker who looked at her for a minute then took a deep breath and informed her "I made an appointment for you with Sharon who's helped you in the past. I'll take you myself in the morning, Erica and Josie have already agreed to come out here and help Sheila with our children. Honey, you'll feel better after talking with Sharon. You'll see that I'm right and that Sheila is just trying to help you."

Stunned Alex said as she started to cry "I never thought that I would see the day that you turned on me. You can go straight to hell Cordell Walker and take your precious Sheila with you." Alex then went upstairs to the nursery where she cried herself to sleep on the floor.

Chapter Four

After pulling herself together the next morning Alex stood in the nursery and protested to her husband "I'm telling you for the last time Walker, there is nothing wrong with me. If you insist on me going to see Sharon for the 'baby blues' you will regret it."

"Alex, I think that there is and you are going to see Sharon if I have to drag you there myself. Honey, I'm just making sure that you're okay."  Walker was saying as Josie knocked on the door jam and asked Alex "How are you?"  Waiting until after Walker left Alex answered "Considering that my nanny has convinced my husband that I hate my youngest son because of his looks and plan to harm him, not good."

Josie said "Alex, I know that this is very upsetting to you but maybe you ought to go along with Walker on this one. Now before you say anything, if you go willingly to see the therapist, Sharon will see that you're okay and not a threat to Sam. Then Walker will see Sheila for what she is, a trouble maker and fire her himself."

After thinking about it for a minute Alex answered "Okay Josie, you may have a point there. But do me a favor and don't let Sam out of your sight, yours or Erica's, please. I really think that she is much more than a trouble maker, the way she holds Sam bothers me. It's like she thinks that Sam is her son, I know that sounds crazy but it's how I feel."

"Don't worry, we will a close eye on Sam, now go."  Josie assured Alex who went and told her husband that she was ready to go. As they were getting into his truck Walker said "I'm sorry about this Alex, but I am worried about you."

"Whatever just get us there because the sooner I can show Sharon that I'm fine the sooner that I can be back home with my children. Then you'll see just how wrong you have treated me because of Sheila's lies and she had better not take off with him while we're at the therapist." Alex informed Walker who replied "Enough, Sam will be there when we get back, you'll see."

"He had better be or our marriage is over." Alex snapped at him. Sharon met with them separately then together. After they were both seated in her office Sharon said to them "Mr. and Mrs. Walker, I don't think that there is anything wrong other than the stress of taking care of five young children but to be on the safe side I would like to see for myself how you both interact with Sam and how Sheila interacts with him too. Is it possible to bring Sam here today?"

Alex answered before Walker could say anything "I would prefer it to be at the ranch, Sam's lungs weren't fully developed when he was born and he needs medication everyday for them. I don't want to take him outside just yet."  Turning to Walker Sharon asked him "I could follow you out to the ranch, if that's okay with you "

"That's fine, I just want to make sure that Alex is okay."  Walker answered and they drove out to the ranch. Alex got out of the truck and hurried into the house while Josie and Erica went outside and Josie asked Walker "Where's Sam?"

Stunned he asked "He's here, isn't he?"  After exchanging looks with each other Josie led Walker into the house while Erica stayed outside and called her husband James Trivette up on the phone and told him that Sheila had taken off with Sam while the Walkers were at Sharon's office.

As Walker and Josie entered the house Alex came back down the steps and asked them "Where is Sam at?"

"Sheila said that Walker told her to take him to the therapist office so that she could see how you were treating him. She left about ten minutes after you did." Josie answered. Just then one of the babies began to cry and after glaring at her husband Alex went upstairs to the infant. Walker questioned Josie "Are you sure that Sheila said that I wanted him taken to Sharon's office?"

"Very sure, both Erica and I argued with her about taking him there but she was insistent and with the way that you've been treating Alex lately we thought it was what you wanted, I'm so sorry."  Josie said as Erica came in and said to him "Walker, Jimmy is on his way here with Sydney and Gage. They have already issued an amber alert."

Walker paled and said to no one "Oh god, what have I done?"

Angela answered him by saying "You gave baby Sam to Miss Sheila so that he could be with people that he looks like."

"Angela, what are you talking about?"  Walker questioned his daughter who answered her father "Miss Sheila said that you were giving baby Sam to her because babies should be with people that they look like and he looks like her. Not you and Mommy or the other babies. Miss Sheila told me that the other day when she said was going to be Sam's new Mommy.  She said that I wasn't to tell Mommy because you would get mad at me for telling your secret, that was why you took Mommy to see Miss Sharon. That Mommy was going to cry for Sam and Miss Sharon would help her stop crying for him. Did I do good keeping your secret daddy?"  Stunned Walker didn't answer as Alex who had come down the steps with Cooper sat down on the bottom one and began to cry. Josie took Cooper out of her arms as Erica went and got Michaela from the nursery.

Chapter Five

They did everything that they had been trained to do in cases like these but there were no leads.  Sheila seemed to have just disappeared with Sam. Sharon hung around to make sure that Alex was doing okay and even offered to give Alex a sedative which she refused saying that she needed to be clear-headed to take care of her other children. After Sharon left Walker started to go outside when Alex called to him from the kitchen "Walker!"  Hurrying into the kitchen he asked "What honey?"

Holding up the bottle containing Sam's medicine Alex said to him "She didn't take his medicine, Sam needs it every day for his lungs." Walker answered his wife "I'm going to the reservation and get our son back, she has to have taken him there."

Alex bitterly said to her husband "She's not stupid enough to take my youngest son there."

"I'll just go there to be sure."  Walker answered his distraught wife who then snapped at him "Will you just use your brains for once and call Sam first. Sharona, his wife is Sheila's cousin, remember?  She might have an idea where baby Sam was taken to."

Just then the doorbell rang and Sydney answered it to find Sam Coyote standing there, Sam asked "Is Walker here?  I have to tell him something." Alex and Walker entered the hallway and after taking a look at Alex's face Sam said to them "Please tell me that I didn't get here too late to warn you about Sheila?"

"Yes, you did. Sam do you have any idea where she could have taken him to?"  Walker questioned his old friend who answered him "No, but Sharona will talk to Sheila's mother and see if she has any ideas.  There's no point in talking to Sheila's father because he doesn't believe in marrying outside of your kind.  He preaches that you should be with people that you look like and that races shouldn't mix.  I'm so sorry Alex but this morning Sharona's Aunt Autumn who is Sheila's mother called my wife up and said that Sheila had told her old boyfriend that she had given birth to his son about seven weeks ago. Sharona asked me to drive down here and talk to Sheila about lying to him. I never thought that she would take Sam and pass him off as her's in an effort to please her father with a baby that looked like he does."

"Well she took my son while we were at my friend Sharon's office, isn't that right Walker?" Alex snidely said to her husband and then said to Sam "Little Sam has to have medication every day for his lungs because they weren't fully developed when he was born and Sheila left it behind. It's just a matter of time until he has trouble breathing."

"Alex, don't worry. I'll help Walker find my name sake I promise you this." Sam pledged because it was he who had gotten Sheila the job as the Walker's nanny because she was his wife's younger cousin.

Walker suggested "Alex, honey maybe you should take a nap?  It's been a long day, you have to be tired."

"No, and stop with the phony concern. After all your so-called concern for me led you to drag me to Sharon's office leaving Sheila free to take my son. I told you that she was up to something but would you listen?  No, you took Sheila's word over mine and look where it's gotten us."  A still angry Alex said to her husband who replied "I know that I made a terrible mistake and that you may never forgive me for it, but I am worried about you Alex."

"Shove your concern and just get him back." Alex said and left. Walker turned to Sam and explained how he thought that Alex had the 'baby blues' because of Sheila's lies and was going to harm baby Sam. That was why there were at the therapist's office when the baby was taken.

Several hours later Alex demanded that everyone leave her house because she needed some peace and quiet, so they left. Then Ranger Bobbie Hunt showed up at the ranch unaware of what was going on and asked Alex "Mrs. Walker, is it possible for my mother to stay at your Hope Center?  Her apartment building just burnt down and she has nowhere to live since I'm relocating and she doesn't want to move to Austin with me. She's also jobless because she worked in the business that was located on the first floor of her building."

Walker answered her "Ranger Hunt, now is not a good time."  Bobbie turned to leave when Alex said to her "I'm in need of a nanny since mine just ran off with my youngest son. Is your mother interested in the job?"

"I'm sorry, I didn't know. We'll just go." Bobbie said to Alex who then replied "Just bring your mother in. She can stay here until I find another live-in nanny, there's no room at the Hope Center right now. She doesn't have to help with the babies, I'll do it by myself."

Bobbie Hunt brought her mother in and she said to the Walkers "This is my mother Betty Stone, thank you for letting her stay here. I have to go now."  Then she left and Betty Stone said to them "Mr. and Mrs. Walker, Bobbie explained the situation to me and I will be glad to help out with the children in return for staying here until you find another nanny and I find another job and a place to live. I have references if you want to check them."

"Miss Stone, your daughter is a Ranger and that's good enough for me."  Alex said and then showed her the bedroom and went upstairs After hearing one of the babies cry Betty said to Walker "Just show me where their bottles are and I'll be glad to help with them." Walker showed her how Alex liked the bottles warmed up and Betty then helped Alex with Cooper and Michaela.

Chapter Six

It was now three days later and in spite of a intensive manhunt they had learned nothing about where Sheila could have taken Sam to. Betty told them to worry about Sam, that she could stay on as the nanny until after they found Sam because they didn't need to worry about finding another nanny with everything that they were going through. Alex told her that she would be paid $300. an week as long as she remained the nanny and thanked Betty for staying on until they found Sam. Alex was so upset with her husband that she had taken to sleeping on a cot that she had placed in the nursery. She was polite to him in front of their older children but other than that Alex didn't speak with Walker unless she had to. One night as they were eating dinner Walker asked her "Alex, how long are you going to sleep in the nursery? It's not good for you or the babies. "

"Where else do you suggest that I sleep?  With a man who thought that I had lost my mind and was a danger to my youngest son because of his looks?  Get serious and don't tell me what is good for my babies. I'll be the judge of that from now on." Alex said to her husband.

Angela then asked her mother "Mommy, do you think baby Sammie is okay at the horse's head?"

Walker asked his daughter "What horse's head?"

"When Miss Sheila told me that she was going to be baby Sam's new Mommie she said that they were going to live at the horse's head."  Angela answered her father who told Alex "I'll call Sam and see if Sharona or her Aunt Autumn knows anything about a horse's head." As Walker got up from the table to make his phone call Ray threw some food on the floor and Angela asked her father "Daddy, Ray just threw his food on the floor.  Are you going to give him away too?"

Alex answered her daughter by saying "Angela, your Daddy did not give your brother away and he would never give any of you children away. Sheila stole Sam and Daddy is going to get him back as he would do for the rest of you.  Sweetheart Daddy loves all of you very much."

Walker then went into the kitchen and called Sam Coyote. Returning to the dining room he said "Sheila's mother Autumn said that the horse's head is on the reservation that Sheila grew up on, she played there as a child. Autumn told Sam that due to her ex-husband's influence only full-blooded Cherokees are welcomed there. She's agreed to take Sam and me there tonight to see if Sheila took baby Sam there."

"If he's there you have to get him to a hospital right away, his lungs may have been damaged. Since we haven't gotten his birth certificate in the mail you can't use that to prove that he's ours." Alex said to Walker who asked her "Sam is ours, why should I have to prove it."

"Walker, you're going to a reservation where only Cherokee people are welcomed to get our son who looks like he's a full-blooded Cherokee and doesn't look like either one of us. Sheila has been telling people that he's her's and when you show up and say otherwise, I doubt if they'll believe you. You have to prove that Sam is ours by his birthmark and you have to do it quickly." Alex pointed out.

"Okay, what does his birthmark look like and where is it?"  Walker asked Alex who answered him "It's just the same as his Daddy's."

"Honey, I'll call you just as soon as I find him."  Walker promised.

"Please just go already." Alex said and he left.  Six hours later Walker called her "Alex I got our son. We're on our way by helicopter to the hospital right now."

"Oh god, what's wrong with him?" Alex asked her husband who replied "He's having a lot of trouble with his breathing. Sam is on oxygen as we speak. Listen Sydney is coming out to the house to help Betty with the children and Trivette is on his way there to drive you to the hospital."  It was the longest ride Alex could ever remember taking.  Hurrying down the hospital corridor to where Walker was standing Alex asked him "How is he?  Sam will be okay, won't he?"

"Sam is in very serious condition right now, his lungs weren't working like they should have been.  He's also very dehydrated because Sheila's father Raven decided that the baby needed to be a sweat lodge to rid him of his cough." Walker said to Alex and when she looked like she was going to faint he attempted to put his arms around her but she shrugged them off. Walker then told Alex "Sam and Autumn helped to convince them that I was Sam's father but they refused to arrest Sheila for kidnapping him because her father Raven said that Sheila was simply trying to put Sam with his kind and meant no harm. That I should take Sam and leave before he changed his mind and kept Sam. Since Sam was having trouble breathing we decided to get medical attention for him and worry about arresting her later."

"So she's running around free as a bird while my son fights for his life?" Alex questioned her husband who could only nod yes.

About three hours later the doctor came out and said to them "Mr. and Mrs. Walker, your son will have to spend the next several days in the intensive care unit. He seems to be responding to the breathing treatment. You appeared to have gotten him in time to prevent permanent damage but until he's two you will have to watch out for signs of asthma.  Now in cases like this with an infant we generally permit a parent to spend as much time as possible with the child. Usually the mother but in your case with other small children at home would you prefer that the father stay instead?"

Alex answered "Yes, it makes sense for Walker to stay with him but I will be here as much as I can." The doctor then led them into where Sam was and left them alone with him. Looking at her son Alex said with tears in her eyes "Look at him, so tiny and there are so many machines." 

Walker said in an attempt to reassure her "He'll be fine. I know that because Sam is your son." After looking at the baby for awhile longer Alex turned to Walker and looking him the eyes told him "He had better be." Then she left.

Chapter Seven

Two days later Alex came down the hospital corridor with all of the children and Betty. Walker said to his wife "Sam spent another peaceful night and they are going to transfer him to the nursery later on today. The doctor was just by a little while ago and said that if all goes well Sam will be home in three days."

Near tears Alex answered "That's good to hear."

Walker then questioned "Alex, why did you bring all of the children to the hospital?  I understand that you don't want to be away from Cooper and Michaela but they won't let either Ray or Angela in to see Sam."

"I know that, the babies and I are here for our checkups. Can you watch Angela and Ray for me?  Betty is going to help me with Cooper and Michaela's checkup, then after I bring them back to you, I'll have my checkup with Dr. Bates." Alex explained to Walker who said to her "Sure honey, I can go with you to the baby doctor if you need me too."

Before Alex could answer him Angela asked her "Mommy, are you going to divorce Daddy?" Alex answered "No honey."

Angela then told her mother "The kids at school said that you were for Daddy letting Miss Sheila steal Sammie."  Looking at her daughter Alex answered her "Like I told you before Angela, your father did not let Sheila take baby Sam. She stole him and your father went and got him back. Sweetheart, your father would do anything to protect you children."

Walker took his wife's arm and led her aside and then asked "Are you just saying that so Angela won't get upset?  Are you planning on divorcing me after Sam's better for his being kidnapped?" Alex protested "This is not the time to discuss this matter."

Walker replied "I think that it is."

Getting mad Alex said to her husband "Fine, we'll discuss it then. Can you tell me whatever possessed you to believe that I was nuts and a threat to my youngest baby?  That I was going to hurt him because I didn't like the way he looks?  Can you explain that to me?  Do you know how it felt to have the one person that has always been there for me, no matter what turned on me so completely?  That you weren't there for me when I needed you to be?  That you believed the word of a woman who was planning on stealing my son?  Go ahead, I'm waiting for an answer."

"I can't. I know that I should have believed in you and I didn't. I'm sorry Alex, more than you'll ever know." Walker answered her. She just walked away from him followed by Betty. After the babies' checkup they were taken back to Walker and Alex went to her checkup at Dr. Bates' office. After the checkup Dr. Bates stunned Alex by asking her "Mrs. Walker, will you ever be able to forgive me?"

Unsure about what Dr. Bates was talking about Alex questioned her "For what Dr. Bates?"  She answered "For telling your husband that there was a very high possibility that you would suffer with postpartum depression."

"Why would you tell Walker something like that?" Alex asked.

"Because you gave birth to three babies instead of the two that you were expecting and then getting a tubal litigation to prevent future pregnancies. Plus you were so upset about not being able to breastfeed them like Angela and Ray. That's a lot to deal with at one time and I thought that you would have some trouble adjusting to things. Alex, I'm afraid that I really overstressed it to Mr. Walker, I said that you would become depressed in my medical opinion. I told him that if you even showed a hint of not being able to cope or if you seemed moody to get you help immediately. Once I found out that you were going to have a live in nanny I wrote down the signs for her to look out for since she would be with you during the day. I was so sure that you would get postpartum depression and I was wrong." Dr. Bates explained to Alex who took a deep breath and then said to her "Dr. Bates, I'm stronger than that. I have to be with a crazy cowboy for a husband."

"Okay Mrs. Walker, you are perfectly fine and you can resume relations with your husband whenever you want to."  Dr. Bates told Alex who then left her office.  Meeting Walker in the corridor Alex asked him "Can you watch them for awhile longer?  I want to see Sam."

"Yes, did Dr. Bates say that you were okay?  What about the babies, are they doing okay?" Walker asked and Alex smiled and said "They're fine, I'm fine."  Then she went in to see Sam after Alex came back out she told her husband "After he's home, we need to talk."

Walker answered "I know."  Betty and Alex then took the children home.

Chapter Eight

Three days later Sam was home from the hospital and after checking on all of his children Walker retired to his bedroom. When Alex entered it he asked her "It's time for that talk, isn't it?"

Sighing she answered "Yes, it is and I would like to go first, okay?" After Walker nodded okay Alex began "Dr. Bates explained that she told you that I would have postpartum depression and while I can understand some of your behavior I can't understand why you would have ever thought that I would hold the way Sam looks against him. Walker, you know how much I loved Uncle Ray and how I always wanted the children to know all about their Cherokee heritage. But for you to accuse me of racial bias, how could you?"

Clearing his throat Walker said "One of things that Dr. bates told me was that in a lot of cases of postpartum depression the women focus on some aspect of the baby and hurt them because of their imperfections."

Alex angrily interrupted him "I do not consider the way Sam looks to be a imperfection."

"I know that now Alex."  Walker answered his wife who said to him "But you believed Sheila when she told you that didn't you?"

"Yes, I did. Alex, Dr. Bates said that since you weren't expecting Sam and since he doesn't look like the other two you would most likely focus on him. That you would see him as imperfect and when Sheila started to tell me that you seemed to resent Sam, I believed her and I shouldn't have. I'm sorry." Walker replied.

"But what about when I told you that I was fine and that she was lying, why didn't you believe me then?"  Alex questioned Walker who answered "Because Dr. Bates said that you would deny it and say that the person who was trying to get you help was really the one out to harm your son."

"Okay, fine, whatever."  Alex said to her husband who then told her "Alex, I am so sorry that I didn't believe you. I regret what I did."  Alex just left the room and went to the nursery while Walker took a shower.

As Walker was getting into bed Alex re-entered the bedroom and he asked her "Is there something wrong with one of the children?"

"No, they are fine." Alex answered as she got a nightgown from her dresser as her husband got into bed. Alex went into the bathroom and took a shower. When she was done she returned to the bedroom and just stood by the bed looking at Walker. Finally Alex asked him "Walker I am going to ask you a question and I want an honest answer. If a person other than a Native-American had told you that I resented Sam because of his looks would you have believed them?  Or were you so ready to believe her because she's a Cherokee and I'm not?"

Walker answered Alex "Yes, I would have. Alex I know that you are really upset with me right now and rightfully so because I am the one responsible for Sam's being kidnapping but I believed that you had the 'baby blues' and if anyone else had told me the same thing I would have believed them too."

As she got into bed Alex said "Okay." Walker then questioned "Alex not that I mind but why are you getting into our bed?"

"It's still my bed, isn't it?"  She asked him back and he said "Yes but you have been sleeping in the nursery because I let Sheila steal Sam."

"Walker, you didn't let Sheila steal Sam. Yes, some of your actions were very upsetting to me at the time and while I still think that you were misguided in them. I also now realize that you thought that you were helping me at the time." Alex answered.

"Alex, if it wasn't for me dragging you off to Sharon's Sheila never would have been able to take Sam."  Walker told her.

"Walker, enough. You made some choices that were very hurtful to me but you aren't responsible for Sam's being taken. Sheila was determined to take him and one way or another she would have. Walker, we have both made mistakes in the past but we have never let them destroy us.  I don't want this time to be any different." Alex said as she turned off her lamp. Turning it back on he asked "What do you mean?"

"I mean that you love me and that you were following Dr. Bates' advice, because you were worried about me. That you never meant for our son to be taken. That you had no way of knowing that Sheila was lying and telling you that I was behaving exactly in the manner that Dr. Bates had told you to look out for."  Alex responded to Walker who said "Still I was wrong and I don't blame you if you can never forgive me."

Placing her finger on his lips Alex said "Enough with the blame, as far as I'm concerned it's over and done with but if you ever get the idea to drag me anywhere ever again I'll strangle you, got that?"

"Yes dear." Walker answered his wife as he settled into bed. Alex then said to him as she again turned off her lamp "Guess what else Dr. Bates told me?"

Walker said "What honey?"

A smiling Alex said "That I could resume relations with my husband whenever I wanted to."

"Any idea on when you might want to do that?" Walker inquired and Alex teased him "Oh, I don't know.  Maybe never or maybe tonight. After all I do have some trouble with keeping my hands off of you." Pulling her into his arms Walker said "I don't deserve you but I do love you so much Alexandra."

"Cordell how about proving it?" Alex teased as he set about proving it. When they were done she said "Please don't ever question my sanity or my love for all of our children again. That hurt me so much."

"I know and I won't do anything like that ever again, you have my word."  Walker told Alex. Snuggling closer she said "I like your word but I like something else much better."

"Lady, for having five children you are so naughty at times." Walker said as Alex began stroking him. Then she added "This is so much better than your word." Then they made love again.

I don't own Walker Texas Ranger, CBS and other entities do. Neither I or this story is meant as an infringement on their rights. It was written as a tribute to a very good show, nothing more.